All In

Two and a half weeks. 16 days to be exact, until I leave this amazing country. These past ten weeks have been incredible. Even though I am working with the same organization, this trip was so different. God has taught me some tough lessons. One of them being that I cannot do what I am doing on my own strength. At all. Not even a little bit. One of the many, and I mean many, books I read during these last 10 weeks was Secondhand Jesus by Glenn Packiam . Here is a quote from the book:

"Regardless of our culture, story, or religion, there seems to be something in all of us that makes us want to be better people. If goodness is the common goal of religion, then progress is the common pursuit of humanity. Every new year is a new chance to renew our vows to lose weight, spend more time with our families, go to church more regularly, give more money to good causes, and watch less TV. That is not a bad impulse. It probably is some evidence of the imago Dei in us. We are made in God’s image and want to do Godlike things. The problem comes not in desiring to do such things but in believing that we are capable of those things."



What he talks about in his book is that it is impossible for us to do any good apart from Christ. We may desire those things, but unless we are dependent on Christ, nothing we do is "good". Even doing mission work in Africa. I realized that I was starting to become weary and just burnt out, going through the motions when it hit me. I have been doing this on my own. That is why I am so exhausted and worn out. Us girls just got done studying the book of Galatians. Galatians 6:9 says, "Let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap,  f if we do not give up." I was becoming weary and it definitely affected my attitude and outlook. A popular misconception is that out in the mission field, your relationship with God is at it's best. That can be  true, however for me it is a constant struggle to keep up with my end of the relationship. Satan is continually throwing things at me that get me distracted and keep my eyes off of Christ. The best and worst times in my relationship with Him have been when I am in the mission field. You are either fully dependent, or thinking you are capable of this on your own. Either all in, or nothing at all. There is no in between.

If there is anything that I can't stress enough, it is that if you are a follower of Christ than you need to be all in. Completely dependent. Sold out Jesus freak. Whatever your word for it is. I will post another blog in a few days of what I have been doing lately, but for now I just wanted to be honest with you guys and let you know what challenges I have been facing and overcoming while here.

Lauren